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Post by apolloswill on Apr 8, 2015 14:16:38 GMT
Amazing job. Of course you are wrong. Even when green mean machinez picked weird skills and their coach is the biggest noob, no one can beat their luck.
GREEN MEAN MACHINEZ FOR THE WIN
Still very nice diagram.
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Post by Deleted on Apr 8, 2015 14:24:01 GMT
Amazing job. Of course you are wrong. Even when green mean machinez picked weird skills and their coach is the biggest noob, no one can beat their luck. GREEN MEAN MACHINEZ FOR THE WIN Still very nice diagram. just curious, is the image is visible in the post now or did you use the link I put in?
and I'm absolutely pulling for the Machinez. I have money on Nails but I'd be happy to lose it
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Post by apolloswill on Apr 8, 2015 14:56:57 GMT
Amazing job. Of course you are wrong. Even when green mean machinez picked weird skills and their coach is the biggest noob, no one can beat their luck. GREEN MEAN MACHINEZ FOR THE WIN Still very nice diagram. just curious, is the image is visible in the post now or did you use the link I put in?
and I'm absolutely pulling for the Machinez. I have money on Nails but I'd be happy to lose itDiagram is out great in the post, and look amazing.
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Post by Mercy Flush on Apr 8, 2015 15:13:36 GMT
Greetings from Plague City K. Offebrand!
Off the back of the intense media speculations surrounding Blood & Snot on the eve of the playoffs we hope to allay the conserns of the press, rivals & most importantly or legions of nurgle fans - bighting their rotten nails off after what many see as a big wobble just before the main event!
After a big scare Vs Rising Vengeance on the final week 7 league match the coach has had to drastically rethink squad preparations for the upcoming match(s?)!
An MNG'd Nurgle Warrior has been unceremoniously axed & replaced + a 4th pestigor brought in, brining the team up to maximum lineup potential for the 1st time this season.
Against a dwarf team with blanket guard the max strength was considered vital + with players leaving the pitch in droves boosting the lineup to 9 regen players rather than relying of the hopeless rotters as fodder vs skilled opponents was no longer viable. The TV hike is unavoidable - 1 or 2 rotters may well be sacked prior to the opening 1st round so TV is more likely to be around the 1490 area.. & with half an eye on the rest of the board it won't be too long before there are several teams closing in on this by quarter/semi final time.
All we can say about wizards are... bring it!! With fouling, overtime & injuries to juggle we feel having a bench during the knockouts is worth the risk of some jumped up harry potter wannabe firing blanks at a regen warrior! Nurgle don't suffer as badly as dwarfs, but the prospect of being short of players for a crucial drive would be disaster.
It'll take everyting we've got to get past the 1st round, but being written off as champions eases the pressure slightly - whatever happens it'll make for a classic Scarecrow & The Ass Grape episode here at Plague City next week!
I hope this settles your readers nerves somewhat Mr. Offebrand, i hope you won't enjoy me eating my words too much in 7 days time!
Yours plaguefully, Mercy Flush.
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Post by Deleted on Apr 11, 2015 1:59:26 GMT
Howdy all. K. Offebrand here, a commentator so talented I've been accused of witchcraft! This weeks pre-game analysis for the playoff match; AvenOgres Assemble vs. East Bay Raiders
(I was unable to do a pre-game on the AvenOgres in MD7, so I feel they are owed a spot in this week's show. But it's still weeks best match!) In continuation of our show's hallowed, longstanding tradition of encouraging murder, I have placed bounties on the following players. *Black WidOgre*
This lovely lady sits right at the top of the hall of fame with 6 casualties. See that AV bust? Time to finish the job! *Lorunddis* What a player! Its as if he was tailored to defeat ogres. If the AvenOgres want to have any snotlings at all in the second half, they will need to foul/pile on this guy relentlessly. Otherwise this fellow might tan himself some snot-leather underwear.Kill either of these rising stars and K. Offebrand will happily pay out 100 Gps for your trouble, courtesy of our favorite immodest blowhard, The Mercenary. That heartless tin man is currently MIA, probably recovering from rectal trauma or a similarly embarrassing injury. We'll push the gold through personally if necessary. Why It Will Be AwesomeSide Step vs. Frenzy; want to see a Norse team think really hard before blocking? well this is your match! A few unlucky pushes will have 'zerkers and werewolves suckered right into the reach of our favorite super herOgres
Tons of Fouls; Who's better at fouling than snots? Expect a gang foul on AV 7 nearly every turn.
ClawPOMB big guys vs. Low AV; Six Big guys running around, punching some incredibly flimsy AV, and each other! If it gets as bloody as I predict, the local ground water will be red for weeks. K. Offebrand's Predictions8 total casualties; This is a conservative estimate. The metallic tang of blood will permeate the air for kilometers! Wounded players will long for the cold embrace of a peaceful grave! Throwing Everywhere; The dugout will fill up fast, so expect desperation to ramp up quickly. Both teams will throw the ball/snots despite being atrocious passers. This means turnovers!Overtime!!!; Scoring will elude both teams all match. The winner will walk the ball in over the shattered bodies of his enemies after a 16 turn brawl.
Result1-0 to the AvenOgres
The AvenOgres will pull out a victory, but have some serious roster management to look forward too. Now get out there and smash some faces.
K. Offebrand signing off
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Post by apolloswill on Apr 11, 2015 3:14:35 GMT
As always, really, really good. You have an amazing talent, and I am already look forward to the next one.
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Post by apolloswill on Apr 21, 2015 22:06:09 GMT
*coughs* So who is going to win the tin final, K. Offebrand?
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Post by Deleted on Apr 22, 2015 0:55:55 GMT
Behold peasants! K. Offebrand has returned in style once again to give you great news for the Tin Cup playoff finals. Over the course of the last week you were forced to watch the playoffs without my silky sweet voice narrating. I've sensed the unrest in my brief absence and have a quick fix of K. Offebrand to hold you over until next weeks show. With some cajoling from yours truly, I have managed to bring in a sponsor to help finance the upcoming championship, and more importantly, my coverage of said event!!! That's right! Your favorite chaos sports drink was so enthused that chaos worshiper teams Blood&Snot and 14 Things to do with Orcs made the finals they decided to finance the whole last round of games! Goatarade GEO (and ardent B&S fan) Billiam Scruffhorn has chosen to unveil two new flavors to celebrate their partnership with the Tin & Bones Cup. Ruddy Blood & Sour SnotOur very generous new sponsors have provided me with a case of new Sour Snot flavored Goatarade which I have right here in our studio. *Gulp*Delicious!!! With this new safer formula I can drink with less fear of sprouting something unnatural, and the thick, viscous consistency will keep that taste in my mouth for hours. Anyway, There is just one more match to be settled before the Tin Cup finals begin, meaning you impatient buggers need only wait a few more days to be graced with my wisdom once again! So tune in this weekend when your unsanctioned analyst will be there to issue death warrants, interview players, and brief you on the action. Next weeks show; a glimpse at undefeated Nurgle sensations, Blood&SnotDrink Goatarade! the Cursed Thirst Quencher
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Post by Deleted on Apr 22, 2015 1:01:57 GMT
*coughs* So who is going to win the tin final, K. Offebrand? That's a nasty cough you've got there Offebrand fan. Why don't you wash down that frog in your throat with a complimentary case of Goatarade Classic, Courtesy of me, K. Offebrand.Feel better soon. And drink that slowly, there's enough alcohol in this stuff to knock out a minotaur
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Post by Squiggy on Apr 22, 2015 1:06:53 GMT
Behold peasants! K. Offebrand has returned in style once again to give you great news for the Tin Cup playoff finals. Over the course of the last week you were forced to watch the playoffs without my silky sweet voice narrating. I've sensed the unrest in my brief absence and have a quick fix of K. Offebrand to hold you over until next weeks show. With some cajoling from yours truly, I have managed to bring in a sponsor to help finance the upcoming championship, and more importantly, my coverage of said event!!! That's right! Your favorite chaos sports drink was so enthused that chaos worshiper teams Blood&Snot and 14 Things to do with Orcs made the finals they decided to finance the whole last round of games! Goatarade GEO (and ardent B&S fan) Billiam Scruffhorn has chosen to unveil two new flavors to celebrate their partnership with the Tin & Bones Cup. Ruddy Blood & Sour SnotOur very generous new sponsors have provided me with a case of new Sour Snot flavored Goatarade which I have right here in our studio. *Gulp*Delicious!!! With this new safer formula I can drink with less fear of sprouting something unnatural, and the thick, viscous consistency will keep that taste in my mouth for hours. Anyway, There is just one more match to be settled before the Tin Cup finals begin, meaning you impatient buggers need only wait a few more days to be graced with my wisdom once again! So tune in this weekend when your unsanctioned analyst will be there to issue death warrants, interview players, and brief you on the action. Next weeks show; a glimpse at undefeated Nurgle sensations, Blood&SnotDrink Goatarade! the Cursed Thirst Quencher Hell, I'll sponsor your killing/bounty predictions and forecasts! *Throws gold at screen* Courtesy of Butcher Bill's Butcher's Bill!
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Post by Deleted on Apr 22, 2015 1:14:37 GMT
Bribe accepted coach Squiggy! I plan on putting this gold to foul use while the mercenary navigates his swollen head out of his own cavernous anus!
If you're listening Merc, Pay up you shyster! I have murders to finance!
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Post by Squiggy on Apr 22, 2015 6:40:34 GMT
Bribe accepted coach Squiggy! I plan on putting this gold to foul use while the mercenary navigates his swollen head out of his own cavernous anus! If you're listening Merc, Pay up you welcher! I have murders to finance! I second this, bitch owes me money for a dead big guy too.
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Post by Kaiser on Apr 22, 2015 8:54:57 GMT
Perhaps my only complaint is that the Prowler's zombies stomped the wrong blitzer to death. Now I'm out 100 gps! Who's gonna pay for my next show!?! well i loved this so much i will donate 20gp to you now Also am looking for a annalist with skills like yourself would you consider helping out in next seasons Immortal league (season 5) media job to include game analysis team and player spotlights
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Post by Deleted on Apr 23, 2015 0:39:17 GMT
Perhaps my only complaint is that the Prowler's zombies stomped the wrong blitzer to death. Now I'm out 100 gps! Who's gonna pay for my next show!?! well i loved this so much i will donate 20gp to you now Also am looking for a annalist with skills like yourself would you consider helping out in next seasons Immortal league (season 5) media job to include game analysis team and player spotlights It seems the powers at be have finally wised up and acknowledged my outstanding analysis expertise. I have finally received the honor I so richly deserve, a shot to run my show for the greatest Blood Bowl league since the NAF imploded! So you heard it here first, K. Offebrand will be taking his talents to the legendary Iron Phoenix Immortal League for season 5! Get ready for the hard hitting interviews and kill contracts you know and love, now brought to the big time. Legends like Ugrsh and Garnon Orren will be accessible to my vast audience for the first time, so long as they weather the murder attempts I intend to commission. Unfortunately I will have to abandon my bad-ass honorific "unsanctioned analyst" for something a little less stirring, but them's the breaks K. Offebrand signing off for now.
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Post by apolloswill on Apr 23, 2015 1:58:19 GMT
First, YEAH, well deserved, moving to the big league,
Second, CRAP, that means you won't have time for us lowly people
At least I will always have my Goatarade Classic
Looking forward to see what will come out next from the brilliant K. Offebrand.
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