Post by havol on Jan 6, 2015 5:55:41 GMT
Nufflemas is past. Nuffle Year is here! Do you dare continue, dear Coach? Or will you drop out so I can have glory and win!
After a nice admin hiatus of two weeks, I am BACK, gents! I'm tired of lowly admins taking all my fluff-fame! Guys that only admin one... maybe two leagues dare throw fluff around as if it were... well... something grown adults throw around?! I AM BACK! I demand you dregs bow to my fluffyness!
All right, all right... enough of that Mr. Havol. We all know you were (!) pretty good. The other admins have obviously stepped up their game in your absence and now it's your turn. Isn't that how it goes? One minute you're the king of the world... next minute, well... next minute you're fighting for the eighth playoff spot in your own damned league. The ignominy of it all!!
But I'm calm. I'm collected. Are you, dear coach? We still have a full five weeks of regular season play left. You're not out of the thick yet. You can still swim if you're sinking; and if you're floating on top, we can still drag you down! Right, fellas'?
Play has already begun thanks to some unnamed coaches who have taken advantage! Seems like the rest of us are behind the power-curve. Schedule and play your matches by 2000 PST/GMT-8 Tuesday, 13 January 2015.
Upload your matches to IP Iron League (S6). Pword: 123. Same as always, guys
The matches:
Slinky Jack's All Stars v Sour Saurii
Lezzie on Lizzie action? Yes, please
Maybe the best Lizzie coaches in the Iron Phoenix square off. Though each finds themselves on opposite ends of the win/loss columns won't matter. Coach Jounisii has cruised to an improbable lead this season after demolishing their Bronze foe. They chew thru teams and keep their sights on the Iron Crown.
The Challenger desperately needs this win. A loss probably secures Sid's demise... again... Always the bridesmaid, eh, Sid?
Prediction: 2-2 draw. Coach Jounisii will tip his hat to the best Lizzie coach around. Insidious has better Saurus, which I think are key to victory. Jounisii has better Skinks which will aid in keeping the deficit manageable. A good tough match!
Neorromanticos v Babes N' Blades
Beware, Hirumazeo: I have taken notes from Longstreet! I was there last match when he beat you! I have the key to your demise and it's as follows: wait for you to roll 25% 1's and another 15% 2's! 40% of your rolls are below average and I'll be able to pounce! Oh.. that and having your Star Wolf sit out the match for me That would be great Can you help me? Please? LOL
Hiru's got plenty of tackle. Plenty of MB. Plenty of bastard luck against me. That's all he really needs, right? Yeah, I think so too....
Prediction: gah... can I really predict my own loss?! GODDAMIT! please read between the lines on this one...
Gorland Inferno v The Maniac Medics
The Medics are tenuously holding the 9th spot as of this MD. The Inferno hope to change that. Remember when I talked about getting dragged down? Well, Gorbag, this is your perfect chance. (btw, you'd totally be helping me out!!!) You know Jester will bring it. You know Gorbag won't quit.
Prediction: 1-1 draw. Gorbag will seize the initiative and show those puny AV8 humans what for!!! Go get him, Gorbag!
Northern Pain v Banana Warriors
pfft... already played... 2-1 for the Pain! Though I would have guessed otherwise after the thrashing the Warriors dished out on my squad
Severe Drowsiness v White Handz
After last week's debacle, does anyone care to wage against the Drow? This is the form I thought these dark-skinned bastards would start the season. Personally, I think they're the hottest team around... Unit they face Urgsh, that is...
Wait.. WHAT?! Urgsh is not playing?! How the hell does one of the most pivotal players in the league just take a day off?! In the middle of the match week, no less! WHAT?! He's not purposely taking a spa day? He got a boot to the dead? HA!!! How's that feel to have the roles reversed for a change?
Prediction: well, definitely having the second-best Orc Blitzer on the sidelines will surely help. Might actually make the difference. 2-1 for the Drow. Just a gut feeling. (though I think I ate something foul...)
Word of Borf v The Night Hawks
Quietly Manco's Orcs (cheating bastards that they are) have secured the second spot for the Iron crown. How are they so quiet? I don't know, but they have a daunting task in taking on Jester's Night Hawks. Though over 400TV separate the two teams, I still think it's fairly even. Manco's Inducements will prove Jester's undoing.
Prediction: 2-1 for the Borf. Too much strength. Too many inducements. Too much Chaos spam.
Well, coaches, that's all I have this week. I have stayed up waay too late to write this garble. Hope you bums read it. Hope you bums enjoy!
until next week, may the odds be ever in your favor! (wait... someone already used that?!) (Bitch!)
After a nice admin hiatus of two weeks, I am BACK, gents! I'm tired of lowly admins taking all my fluff-fame! Guys that only admin one... maybe two leagues dare throw fluff around as if it were... well... something grown adults throw around?! I AM BACK! I demand you dregs bow to my fluffyness!
All right, all right... enough of that Mr. Havol. We all know you were (!) pretty good. The other admins have obviously stepped up their game in your absence and now it's your turn. Isn't that how it goes? One minute you're the king of the world... next minute, well... next minute you're fighting for the eighth playoff spot in your own damned league. The ignominy of it all!!
But I'm calm. I'm collected. Are you, dear coach? We still have a full five weeks of regular season play left. You're not out of the thick yet. You can still swim if you're sinking; and if you're floating on top, we can still drag you down! Right, fellas'?
Play has already begun thanks to some unnamed coaches who have taken advantage! Seems like the rest of us are behind the power-curve. Schedule and play your matches by 2000 PST/GMT-8 Tuesday, 13 January 2015.
Upload your matches to IP Iron League (S6). Pword: 123. Same as always, guys
The matches:
Slinky Jack's All Stars v Sour Saurii
Lezzie on Lizzie action? Yes, please
Maybe the best Lizzie coaches in the Iron Phoenix square off. Though each finds themselves on opposite ends of the win/loss columns won't matter. Coach Jounisii has cruised to an improbable lead this season after demolishing their Bronze foe. They chew thru teams and keep their sights on the Iron Crown.
The Challenger desperately needs this win. A loss probably secures Sid's demise... again... Always the bridesmaid, eh, Sid?
Prediction: 2-2 draw. Coach Jounisii will tip his hat to the best Lizzie coach around. Insidious has better Saurus, which I think are key to victory. Jounisii has better Skinks which will aid in keeping the deficit manageable. A good tough match!
Neorromanticos v Babes N' Blades
Beware, Hirumazeo: I have taken notes from Longstreet! I was there last match when he beat you! I have the key to your demise and it's as follows: wait for you to roll 25% 1's and another 15% 2's! 40% of your rolls are below average and I'll be able to pounce! Oh.. that and having your Star Wolf sit out the match for me That would be great Can you help me? Please? LOL
Hiru's got plenty of tackle. Plenty of MB. Plenty of bastard luck against me. That's all he really needs, right? Yeah, I think so too....
Prediction: gah... can I really predict my own loss?! GODDAMIT! please read between the lines on this one...
Gorland Inferno v The Maniac Medics
The Medics are tenuously holding the 9th spot as of this MD. The Inferno hope to change that. Remember when I talked about getting dragged down? Well, Gorbag, this is your perfect chance. (btw, you'd totally be helping me out!!!) You know Jester will bring it. You know Gorbag won't quit.
Prediction: 1-1 draw. Gorbag will seize the initiative and show those puny AV8 humans what for!!! Go get him, Gorbag!
Northern Pain v Banana Warriors
pfft... already played... 2-1 for the Pain! Though I would have guessed otherwise after the thrashing the Warriors dished out on my squad
Severe Drowsiness v White Handz
After last week's debacle, does anyone care to wage against the Drow? This is the form I thought these dark-skinned bastards would start the season. Personally, I think they're the hottest team around... Unit they face Urgsh, that is...
Wait.. WHAT?! Urgsh is not playing?! How the hell does one of the most pivotal players in the league just take a day off?! In the middle of the match week, no less! WHAT?! He's not purposely taking a spa day? He got a boot to the dead? HA!!! How's that feel to have the roles reversed for a change?
Prediction: well, definitely having the second-best Orc Blitzer on the sidelines will surely help. Might actually make the difference. 2-1 for the Drow. Just a gut feeling. (though I think I ate something foul...)
Word of Borf v The Night Hawks
Quietly Manco's Orcs (cheating bastards that they are) have secured the second spot for the Iron crown. How are they so quiet? I don't know, but they have a daunting task in taking on Jester's Night Hawks. Though over 400TV separate the two teams, I still think it's fairly even. Manco's Inducements will prove Jester's undoing.
Prediction: 2-1 for the Borf. Too much strength. Too many inducements. Too much Chaos spam.
Well, coaches, that's all I have this week. I have stayed up waay too late to write this garble. Hope you bums read it. Hope you bums enjoy!
until next week, may the odds be ever in your favor! (wait... someone already used that?!) (Bitch!)