Post by Kaiser on May 27, 2015 4:38:11 GMT
BBM INFO: ID 11771 Phoenix Immortal S5, Password 123
All Season 5 MD's and match ups will be posted here (after each week I will delete all other posts here except for the MD posts I make so scroll down to the latest one. This is just a new test set up)
Match Day 1
Coach Jester - Anubis Serpents vs Doc Oz - Pur'pl Pee'pl Eatr's
The war in the trenches will be of focus here, can the young black orcs and troll control the line of scrimmage against the veteran tomb guardians if they can it will free up the blitzers to take out the weaker armoured skeletons, When Coach Jester was asked how he plans to deal with the deadly pile quartet of blitzers he said we have a few play planned I cant say to you guys what they are but lets just say Patella Pete will be involved in some of them.. Patella Pete is known for his dirty play and we suspect we may see some boots put in when the orcs pile on
Prediction: only because I know the serpents and little about the PPE's I will tip the serpents to win 2-1
Player to watch: Patella Pete, just how dirty will he play and will the ref be watching? and PPE's thrower Sorth Longfinger, will he air out the ball as some fan claim he can?
Michaels - Calamitous Intent vs Jounisii- Sour Saurii
The Camps have a tough first game, Coach Michaels is know for his teams playing dirty and I don't expect this team to be any different. Coach Jounisii will look to control the game early with a long slow drive for a score, thats if he can win the toss , though I might be tempted to kick if I were him and try to pick off the Pestigors
Prediction: Sour Saurii to much class and speed they win 3-1
Player to watch: Intense Iguana will start his back to back MVP bid and will he score more than 10 this season? only time will tell
Deano79- Delf Delights vs Goodpass- Jumpy Harpies
Game of the week: It is rare indeed to see 2 elf teams in the immortal league and this game could end up with record scores from both teams. Jumpy Harpies are my tip to make all the passing records this season as Dhrow Well has the best arm in the league and can really air out the deep ball
Prediction: DD seem to wrap up better in their tackles and as long as they keep Rhunr in check and stop the 1 turn scores DD should win 3-2
Player to watch: witch elves Calfenam and Lilriarna, why would you be looking anywhere else? Though Blade Might may just have a big day with that blade of his
Match Day 2
Michaels - Calamitous Intent vs Goodpass- Jumpy Harpies
This could prove to be very painful for the Harpies as Michaels and his team strive to inflict more death and destruction, but that being said the harpies have the movement to keep away. The Baron is out this week leaving only Fantomus to be the only experienced Nergle warrior on the squad, one less player with disturbing presence may help open up some passing lanes. But The harpies dont seem to be an elf team to like to pass with only 1 pass thrown last week for 12 yards, many of the harpies need to lift their game this week if they want to survive
Prediction: Harpies win 2-1 but suffer at least 3 very bad injuries or even a death
Player to watch: so many interesting match ups its hard to pick just one, for the harpies look to see Dolly Dazzle lift and get a score and a big play in defense and for Calamitous Intent Dr. Girlfriend to get back tohis her killing ways and how many players will the beast hold onto with his tentacles?
Coach Jester - Anubis Serpents vs Jounisii- Sour Saurii
Sour Saurii Lost their star Krox last week and the serpents lost Adams Rib one of the best skeleton catches the team had how will this affect both teams? For the serpents the game plan is simple, they have to stop last seasons MVP Intense Iguana, This game may prove to be a bash fest and whoever comes out on top by turn 5 will likely be the winner
Prediction: 2-1 Sour Saurii just too much speed on the team
Player to watch: Intense Iguana who else
Deano79- Delf Delights vs Doc Oz - Pur'pl Pee'pl Eatr's
Game of the week:its first vs second, the only two teams to win from the first week, Doc's quartet of blitzes are the backbone of this team they will do not only the scoring but also the damage, the LOS (line of scrimmage) will most likely be controlled by the PPE's there black orcs are to physically big and strong for double D to any sort of push or drive so they will have to look at other places on the field to try to dominate. Double D will have to pick off targets of opportunity they just cant go toe to toe but with blade might their assassin he may find one or 2and most likely get the score. Pur'pl Pee'pl Eatr's on the other hand will just man up and grind it out, his black orcs may not be the most experienced but they are very gard to get down as they seem to duck and dodge most blocks.
Prediction: Pur'pl Pee'pl Eatr's too strong 3-2
Player to watch: Pur'pl Pee'pl Eatr's rookie thrower Morkram "3 Thumbs" he will be looking to gain more experience in this game i expect to see 2 pass attempts from him and maybe a score
Match Day 3
Michaels - Calamitous Intent vs Goodpass- Jumpy Harpies
Game of the week: with all the speed on this team its a bit of a shock as to how the harpies were kept to just 1 score last week, lineman Rhyt Wyte has said "Its not fair, other teams get chain saws why cant we, why are the refs always making sure we dont use em but turn a blind eye to other teams?" Rhyt was asked last week to leave the chain saw on the bench, he has played hurt all season and is a target for most teams now, we cant blame him wanting an edge can we? but one on the team Treeman Stood Aroot seems happy no chainsaws are out there. Dr. Girlfriend when asked about the upcoming game said "what the Fuck you looking at? I'm a girl, so what i have a deep voice and balls, ever hear of warp stones? so stop looken before i make you a rotter"
Prediction: Harpies win 2-1
Player to watch: Wardancer Harmony Perlude has won the MVP in each of the first to games, maybe we should keep an eye on what the judges see in her "yeah I'm hotand I am not just talking about how i play, have you all not seen how perfect my hair stays in the game" she said while licking and sucking on a lollypop
Coach Jester - Anubis Serpents vs Jounisii- Sour Saurii
Looks like Sour Saurii Krox Divided dragon II most likely played his last game for the team last week when he smashed his collar bone, look to see a new rookie step up this week, I think things wont change much and we will see a replay of last week, the serpents already looking slow and easy beats this season and have yet to score a TD. Intense Iguana said 10 TD's last season was only a warm up for the new record i plan to set this season, MVP me, M..V...P ME"
Prediction: 3-0 Sour Saurii just too much speed on the team
Player to watch: Rotten Ribs Roberts, this banged up veteran has played 91 games for the serpents but his bones are showing age, with a broken neck, smashed knee and fractured skull it seem he plans to hang up his boots. "this will be my last season, it would be nice to get 100 games in for this team but i know i am more a liability for the serpents now and i dont wish that, so once a replacement is found i will hang up my boots" Triple R as he is known to his team mates has the most kills of any player to play for the serpents with 9.
Deano79- Delf Delights vs Doc Oz - Pur'pl Pee'pl Eatr's
Doc and his team are undefeated its up to double D to even things up, its a must win for double D if they dont want the Pur'pl Pee'pl Eatr's to get too far away. Double D runner Menlil said "Those green bastards are colour blind, cant tell purple from green but at least they will know what black and blue looks like when they look at themselves after the game" when Takzog Goblinluva heard about what Menlil had said he replied "Dem iz fighten wordz, Me like good fight, and why no killa bounty on me? dem all uvva players fear Takzog, dat why"
Prediction: Pur'pl Pee'pl Eatr's too strong 3-2
Player to watch: Pur'pl Pee'pl Eatr's rookie thrower Morkram "3 Thumbs" got 2 scores last week but is out this week so look for Gabnar Redhand to take up the slack and score one or even 2, i am sure after the game we may see a new set of skills from this player
Match Day 4
Coach Jester - Anubis Serpents vs Doc Oz - Pur'pl Pee'pl Eatr's
Pur'pl Pee'pl Eatr's Thrower Sorth Longfinger said "weez winz dis en good, my teamz will brak der bonez and me score, dem not gotz no muscles dat why dey lose" The serpent have placed a recruiting drive on, 2 of our reports found out the hard what what that means as they were killed, stripped of their flesh and put on the practice squad, but turns out they were no good and have now been dropped from the side.
Prediction: 3-0 to Pur'pl Pee'pl Eatr's, Serpents have yet to even score and wont again this game
Player to watch: The Big Fella is looking to make a statement this game
Michaels - Calamitous Intent vs Jounisii- Sour Saurii
Intense Iguana said "MVP baby just wait and see, you all know its going to be meee" while nergle warrior Fantomas was quoted to say "The real race is in the pain we inflict, I am equal second with 2 casualties, I would have 87 if the counter the fans but this stupid league only count the players i hurt... Hmm I wonder I i get points for killing reporters?" we didnt stick around to find out
Prediction: Sour Saurii to much class and speed they win 2-1
Player to watch: Intense Iguana can any stop him?
Deano79- Delf Delights vs Goodpass- Jumpy Harpies
Game of the week: Disheartened Coach Goodpass was all but ready to walk out the league, he is not used to being on the losing side, but it was only a feeling right after his loss last week and now he is ready to show all he is still a danger but seems they will not be using a tree this week as none show on their roster, no players were available for a comment. Double D we could not shut up all going on how they will crush this and smash that, we didnt want to listen... well thats till Lilriarna came out and said "you guys like my new bra I will have on for the game?" we all nodded yes but were quickly snapped back to attention and had to run round to get her what she wanted when she then cracked her whip and said "What are you meat sacks still doing just looking? go get me something fucking nice to eat or their will be trouble"
Prediction: DD should win 3-2
Player to watch: witch elves Calfenam and Lilriarna, once again
Match Day 5
Michaels - Calamitous Intent vs Doc Oz - Pur'pl Pee'pl Eatr's
Game of the week: Calamitous Intent last week Hit Goodpass and his elves so hard they left the league for the rest the season, they can smell the blood in the water with The Pur'pl Pee'pl Eatr's having to start a new troll. Warrior The Monarch said " yes we, shall use ones better breeding, to overcome ones enemies on the Field of conflict". As for the triple P's we caught up with thrower Longfinger who went to a High elf passing work shop, he was kicked out after 4 hours after starting three fights and even ate someones dog. "yeah it woz fun, I learns ta frow da ball safe now, me no risk uvver team to catch me frows"
Prediction: Those Orcs seen too hard to stop but they may start to feel the pain of this long season 2-1 to triple P but one or 2 orc stars will miss the next game
Player to watch:New Troll flaprot Doo'n Kil'um how well will he match up to the beast in his first game?
Deano79- Delf Delights vs Coach Jester - Anubis Serpents
Last week Serpents star Patella Pete used acid from a special made hollowed out fake rid bone to kill and dissolve Lazyvomit Tinky Winky and was ejected by the ref, this was in response to Rotten Ribs Roberts killed just moments before coach Jester after the game said "Roberts was a great player and took on the burden of the team he gave his unlife doing what he loved, hitting and killing, he will be missed, but now the focus can shit from trying to get him into the hall of fame and now work on the rest the team, the seasom maybe lost but we can kill and take out as many as we can and that's the new plan, we are also missing tomb guard Tank this week but we may hire some help" Later that day Ramtut was seen walking into the serpents facilities.
Double D lineman Erdar spoke to us as we could not get close to the witch elves "gee no one has ever asked me a question before, um, how will we do? well um good i think, um look just go ask one our blitzers, I just run to where they tell me from the coach, um, oh I know what i am to say, we are taking it one game at a time"
Prediction: 4-0 to double D sperents have yet to score and i dont see that changing soon
Player to watch:Patella Pete, just what sneaky fouls will we see, or not see?
Jounisii- Sour Saurii vs Havol- Border Crossers
This will be the First game for the BC's as they come in to replace Goodpass and his elves, They are no stranger to the immortal league and played in season 3, Star thrower Eber Delchasam "Look we have played cold bloods before we still are looking at crystal ball footage of them but we will be ready, they look to be a good team and are the champs but we are up to the task and have a few ticks of our own"
Sour Saurii will be missing 3 players for the game one is a Saurus with less hitting power and less players this may prove the difference. Grumpy Gharial "I neeedsss sssa new Humansss ssskin Jacket and ssshoess, hmmm a bag asss well, after thisss game I am sssure I will have them"
Prediction: 3-2 Havol gets his first official win of season 5
Player to watch: Intense Iguana is on record pace for the MVP
Match Day 6
Havol- Border Crossers vs Coach Jester - Anubis Serpents
This it to be the 100th game for the big fella,Star Tomb guard for the Serpents, his team have vowed to play hard for him. Rookie throw ra Metacarpals McFee said "its an honor to play with such a legend I plan to get some of these human flesh bags and help convert them to want to play for us, lets hope they all drink poison after the game and sign up, after all who wouldn't want to?"
When we asked BC's Ogre Der Hur-Hur what he thought about what McFee had said he replied "Er wot, I dont av a bag just me elmut ere, I dont getz it? but i like a good drink, wot is poizon anywayz?"
Prediction: 3-0 Havol gets his first official win of season 5
Player to watch:Da Big Fella who else
Jounisii- Sour Saurii vs Doc Oz - Pur'pl Pee'pl Eatr's
Game of the week: Its 1st vs 2nd and we are set for a big one, PPE's star Morgost Skullsplitter offered these fighting words. "I will eat skink pie before during and after da game" Intense Iguana only responded with "yeah right asss if they can catch usss, He isss just a big green bag of wind, jussst watch me ssscore"
Prediction: 1-1
Player to watch:Morgost Skullsplitter just how many will he eat?
Deano79- Delf Delights vs Michaels - Calamitous Intent
Game was played 1-1 we Caught up to double D's Blitzer Torfir who is the only member on the team to hurt the opposition this season, we asked him about their lack of hitting "look we play with style, a thing the rest of you and the the other teams lack, but if you doubt we can hit i will be happy to take you out back and show you what we can do you fucking twat." we didnt go to Calamitous Intent's press conference, no one did, they just smell too bad
Match Day 7
Deano79- Delf Delights vs Coach Jester - Anubis Serpents
It has been the worst season the serpents have ever had and Coach jester has mad some big changes and sacked star skeleton Ben backbone blake will this shake up of the roster get some of the other stars to shine?
Prediction: after a 5-0 loss last week i think its safe to say the serpents will not win this... another loss 4-0
Player to watch:I for one will keep an eye on skull frecking smith, in 3 games he has a kill and 2 injured
Doc Oz - Pur'pl Pee'pl Eatr's vs Michaels - Calamitous Intent
Doc and his team looked unstoppable until he ran into Calamitous Intent, Has Michaels got the answer again? we asked 21 what he thought "I kick, I hit, dats wot I do" dont worry fans we wont ask 21 for more incite again.
Prediction: 2-1 Calamitous Intent
Player to watch:lets see if 21 will kick and hit
Jounisii- Sour Saurii vs Havol- Border Crossers
Catcher Detlef Mehia "yeah thies game wont be a problem for us, I get to line up on skinks, they got nothing on me"
Prediction: 2-1 BC
Player to watch:Catcher Detlef Mehia had 3 scores last week what will he do this week
Match Day 8
Doc Oz - Pur'pl Pee'pl Eatr's vs Havol - Border Crossers
These teams have yet to meet in this season of the Immortal League. The Border Crossers have an opportune game to snatch sneaky victory from the league leaders this week; Doc will be down a little bit of muscle, his star thrower will be sorely missed, and will be down to a single gobo on his bench (pre-inducements). Even so, the Pee’pl Eatr’s blitzing corp can never be counted out, and will be looking to keep the wheels on against the Border Crosser’s full pace offence.
Prediction: Hav might just pip the league leaders to the post. 2-1 to the humans.
Player to watch: One might be tempted to point to the block/pro ogre, but I suspect it’ll be impossible to take your eyes off Takzog Goblinluva. In the absence of a reliable thrower, this str5 blodge monster may well be called on for holding onto the ball, and never letting go.
Coach Jester - Anubis Serpents vs Michaels - Calamitous Intent
My grandfather still raves on about the glory days of the Anubis Serpents, when they looked nigh on unstoppable. Some of the old stars are still firing (they’ve been going for millennia, they aren’t gonna stop now) and Da Big Fella is always mobbed by adoring fans looking for autographs, but the organisers of this competition have gone a step too far this week. Why would they let a team with as much history and prestige as the Serpents be pit against the murderous death machine that Coach Michaels is commanding? Are they really that desperate for ticket sales this season? Yet the Tomb Guards are as un-phased and silent as ever. They know that this too, will pass.
Prediction: Everyone loves an underdog… Jester FTW! C’mon mate – we all believe in you (except Michaels who probably wants to piss on your TG’s graves). 2-0 to the mighty serpents, says the fan-boy replacement fluff writer for the week.
Player to watch: Always, only, ever – Da BIG FELLA!
Deano79- Delf Delights vs Jounisii- Sour Saurii
Two teams, tied in second place at the tail end of the season will be fighting for bragging rights this week. Lets see how the teams match up…
Assassin > Skink (if he can close the distance)
Sauri bruisers > collective str/guard of delfs
Pace of lizards (approximately equal to) manoeuvrability of delfs
Both teams have more than enough tools to deal with their opposition’s tactics… This will be the game to watch imo.
Prediction: 2-2 draw with the assassin putting his leaping knife to good use against a skink or two.
Player to watch: Grumpy. He’s still upset about an orc imposter from the little leagues stealing his name – he’ll be looking to prove once and for all who the real Grumpy is. Heads will roll.
Match Day 9
Jounisii- Sour Saurii vs Doc Oz - Pur'pl Pee'pl Eatr's
Its 1st vs 2nd, is this the prelude to the final? We spoke to Takzog Goblinluva "dere iz no second only first and that be us, dem cold bloods will get a lot colder when dey are six feet under"
Prediction: 2-2 draw
Player to watch: Takzog Goblinluva seems to be on a mission watch out
Deano79- Delf Delights vs Michaels - Calamitous Intent[/i][/b]
Both teams need a win here to have a shot at the final. Double D will find it hard to pass in this game, we asked DD runner Menlil how he plans to handle it "We are focused and wont let anything distract us, they are too slow to catch us anyway, we are confident we can still air it out"
Prediction: Double D for the win 2-1
Player to watch: Will Menlil really try to pass or is it just pre game politics?
Coach Jester - Anubis Serpents vs Havol - Border Crossers
What a horrid season for the Serpents, and it wont get any better, we asked Coach Jester about the season "obviously losing some of our best players at the start of the season set us back, yeah we are now just working to rebuild, we have a few rookies we want to try out for the remaining games and see where it takes us, we will try to end the season on a high that's all we can do"
Prediction: Border Crossers win big 4-1
Player to watch: Border Crossers ogre Der-Hur-Hur lets see how he handles the tomb guards and will he try to go one on one with the legend himself the big fella?
Match Day 10
Havol- Border Crossers vs DocOz- Pur'pl Pee'pl Eatr's
Havol is coming off of the back of a shock loss last week, but will want to put a dent in Doc's post season intentions in his last match of the season. Doc needs to win here to secure his Final spot and will need to play well to get it. Hav has a full squad and knows how to use these Humies. Doc may have the better 11, but he will have to do a lot of maiming to get a numerical advantage that he can thrive on.
Prediction: 2-1 to Havol, I just think the extra bit of pace may do for the Orcs.
Player to Watch: Takzog Goblinluva... a ST 5 dodging Orc... need I say more!!
Michaels - Calamitous Intent vs Coach Jester - Anubis Serpents
Michaels Nurgle are in with a shot of the Final, but rely on results elsewhere. Unfortunately for him he comes up against a resurgent Anubis Serpents, a team that can match his strength and then some. And with his NW's taking a battering last week, even more so than normal. Coach Jester's controversial clear out after a bad start to the season is starting to bear fruit too. A win last week has buoyed the troops and this is just the sort of brawl they will be relishing.
Prediction: 2-1 to The Serpents, just too much strength for Michaels to punch through.
Player to watch: Da Big Fella... one of only 2 IP legends... this TG demands respect and watching!
Jounisii- Sour Saurii vs Deano79- Delf Delights
Lizards in another final at IP.... sigh!! Well the Sour Saurii are there, and deservingly so. This match 2 weeks ago saw a 2-1 win for Jounisii and I think that this game will be much the same. Double D fluffed their lines last week, 2 opportunities to score and win and stay in the race saw cruel bounces of the ball, and so this will be their last match of the season. As for the Saurii, well they are there already, so do they play it safe and protect their key players or do they carry on pounding hard as they have been all season.... time will tell.
Prediction: 2-1 to the Saurii, too much strength, and no leap for Double D this time around.
Player to Watch: Grumpy Gharial. An odd choice given the Skinks on show, but he was key to the Saurii's victory on MD8 and will need to be at his BT best again.
The Final
Jounisii- Sour Saurii vs Doc Oz - Pur'pl Pee'pl Eatr's
And what a final it will be, Coach Jounisii will go in as the underdog for this one as he has two key players out, but he has experience on his side and his team is no stranger to the big stage, with roughly 420 to spend before the game expect some surprises. Will we see a star player? or two? Referee The Goober will be officiating his third final, we asked him will he call a tight and fair game? "Look I do the best I can out there to call the game as fair as i can see, but it is hard sometimes, I need new glasses and my whistle is not always working, sadly I cant afford to get new ones before them. But I will make do" We found it strange that the Goober has never been seen with glasses, but he refused to comment on the question, was it a message to the teams?
when we spoke to Grudging Gecko IV about the ref's statement he only said "I have to stay focused on the game, I have a whistle I can give him if he likes, and my coach is a great guy I am sure he and the team can help him with the money he needs once we win and we will have plenty prize money to go round"
This is the first time on the big stage for Doc and his Pur'pl Pee'pl Eatr's his Blitzers are some of the biggest stars to ever step onto the astro-granite and have the nick name the legion of Boom, will they have nerves and play safe? They played safe vs Calamitous Intent and lost both games will they do the same? we asked Takzogs pet gobbo what he thought about the game "Weee yeah meez be in final, Takzog feed me good, and when me getz da chance me will sqish dem skinkz, dat intentz gwanna fellow is nuffink, I be big star in game youz will see and master Takzog be bigga star dan all of youz... gotz ta go and giff master iz sponge barf now, he likes da wayz i rub hiz muskoolz"
Prediction: This is way to close to call, I do think it will go to extra time and end 3-2 but who? I just don't know... make sure you dont miss it as tickets are selling fast
Player to Watch: Sorth Longfinger is this seasons MVP, he can throw, catch, score and hit he can do it all and well, his deep throws have some elf fans cheering his name. Lets not also forget last seasons MVP, he score 11 TD's and that is a new record, some say he should have got the MVP and maybe they are right. Look to see him stare and out shine Sorth on the field.
All Season 5 MD's and match ups will be posted here (after each week I will delete all other posts here except for the MD posts I make so scroll down to the latest one. This is just a new test set up)
Match Day 1
Coach Jester - Anubis Serpents vs Doc Oz - Pur'pl Pee'pl Eatr's
The war in the trenches will be of focus here, can the young black orcs and troll control the line of scrimmage against the veteran tomb guardians if they can it will free up the blitzers to take out the weaker armoured skeletons, When Coach Jester was asked how he plans to deal with the deadly pile quartet of blitzers he said we have a few play planned I cant say to you guys what they are but lets just say Patella Pete will be involved in some of them.. Patella Pete is known for his dirty play and we suspect we may see some boots put in when the orcs pile on
Prediction: only because I know the serpents and little about the PPE's I will tip the serpents to win 2-1
Player to watch: Patella Pete, just how dirty will he play and will the ref be watching? and PPE's thrower Sorth Longfinger, will he air out the ball as some fan claim he can?
Michaels - Calamitous Intent vs Jounisii- Sour Saurii
The Camps have a tough first game, Coach Michaels is know for his teams playing dirty and I don't expect this team to be any different. Coach Jounisii will look to control the game early with a long slow drive for a score, thats if he can win the toss , though I might be tempted to kick if I were him and try to pick off the Pestigors
Prediction: Sour Saurii to much class and speed they win 3-1
Player to watch: Intense Iguana will start his back to back MVP bid and will he score more than 10 this season? only time will tell
Deano79- Delf Delights vs Goodpass- Jumpy Harpies
Game of the week: It is rare indeed to see 2 elf teams in the immortal league and this game could end up with record scores from both teams. Jumpy Harpies are my tip to make all the passing records this season as Dhrow Well has the best arm in the league and can really air out the deep ball
Prediction: DD seem to wrap up better in their tackles and as long as they keep Rhunr in check and stop the 1 turn scores DD should win 3-2
Player to watch: witch elves Calfenam and Lilriarna, why would you be looking anywhere else? Though Blade Might may just have a big day with that blade of his
Match Day 2
Michaels - Calamitous Intent vs Goodpass- Jumpy Harpies
This could prove to be very painful for the Harpies as Michaels and his team strive to inflict more death and destruction, but that being said the harpies have the movement to keep away. The Baron is out this week leaving only Fantomus to be the only experienced Nergle warrior on the squad, one less player with disturbing presence may help open up some passing lanes. But The harpies dont seem to be an elf team to like to pass with only 1 pass thrown last week for 12 yards, many of the harpies need to lift their game this week if they want to survive
Prediction: Harpies win 2-1 but suffer at least 3 very bad injuries or even a death
Player to watch: so many interesting match ups its hard to pick just one, for the harpies look to see Dolly Dazzle lift and get a score and a big play in defense and for Calamitous Intent Dr. Girlfriend to get back to
Coach Jester - Anubis Serpents vs Jounisii- Sour Saurii
Sour Saurii Lost their star Krox last week and the serpents lost Adams Rib one of the best skeleton catches the team had how will this affect both teams? For the serpents the game plan is simple, they have to stop last seasons MVP Intense Iguana, This game may prove to be a bash fest and whoever comes out on top by turn 5 will likely be the winner
Prediction: 2-1 Sour Saurii just too much speed on the team
Player to watch: Intense Iguana who else
Deano79- Delf Delights vs Doc Oz - Pur'pl Pee'pl Eatr's
Game of the week:its first vs second, the only two teams to win from the first week, Doc's quartet of blitzes are the backbone of this team they will do not only the scoring but also the damage, the LOS (line of scrimmage) will most likely be controlled by the PPE's there black orcs are to physically big and strong for double D to any sort of push or drive so they will have to look at other places on the field to try to dominate. Double D will have to pick off targets of opportunity they just cant go toe to toe but with blade might their assassin he may find one or 2and most likely get the score. Pur'pl Pee'pl Eatr's on the other hand will just man up and grind it out, his black orcs may not be the most experienced but they are very gard to get down as they seem to duck and dodge most blocks.
Prediction: Pur'pl Pee'pl Eatr's too strong 3-2
Player to watch: Pur'pl Pee'pl Eatr's rookie thrower Morkram "3 Thumbs" he will be looking to gain more experience in this game i expect to see 2 pass attempts from him and maybe a score
Match Day 3
Michaels - Calamitous Intent vs Goodpass- Jumpy Harpies
Game of the week: with all the speed on this team its a bit of a shock as to how the harpies were kept to just 1 score last week, lineman Rhyt Wyte has said "Its not fair, other teams get chain saws why cant we, why are the refs always making sure we dont use em but turn a blind eye to other teams?" Rhyt was asked last week to leave the chain saw on the bench, he has played hurt all season and is a target for most teams now, we cant blame him wanting an edge can we? but one on the team Treeman Stood Aroot seems happy no chainsaws are out there. Dr. Girlfriend when asked about the upcoming game said "what the Fuck you looking at? I'm a girl, so what i have a deep voice and balls, ever hear of warp stones? so stop looken before i make you a rotter"
Prediction: Harpies win 2-1
Player to watch: Wardancer Harmony Perlude has won the MVP in each of the first to games, maybe we should keep an eye on what the judges see in her "yeah I'm hotand I am not just talking about how i play, have you all not seen how perfect my hair stays in the game" she said while licking and sucking on a lollypop
Coach Jester - Anubis Serpents vs Jounisii- Sour Saurii
Looks like Sour Saurii Krox Divided dragon II most likely played his last game for the team last week when he smashed his collar bone, look to see a new rookie step up this week, I think things wont change much and we will see a replay of last week, the serpents already looking slow and easy beats this season and have yet to score a TD. Intense Iguana said 10 TD's last season was only a warm up for the new record i plan to set this season, MVP me, M..V...P ME"
Prediction: 3-0 Sour Saurii just too much speed on the team
Player to watch: Rotten Ribs Roberts, this banged up veteran has played 91 games for the serpents but his bones are showing age, with a broken neck, smashed knee and fractured skull it seem he plans to hang up his boots. "this will be my last season, it would be nice to get 100 games in for this team but i know i am more a liability for the serpents now and i dont wish that, so once a replacement is found i will hang up my boots" Triple R as he is known to his team mates has the most kills of any player to play for the serpents with 9.
Deano79- Delf Delights vs Doc Oz - Pur'pl Pee'pl Eatr's
Doc and his team are undefeated its up to double D to even things up, its a must win for double D if they dont want the Pur'pl Pee'pl Eatr's to get too far away. Double D runner Menlil said "Those green bastards are colour blind, cant tell purple from green but at least they will know what black and blue looks like when they look at themselves after the game" when Takzog Goblinluva heard about what Menlil had said he replied "Dem iz fighten wordz, Me like good fight, and why no killa bounty on me? dem all uvva players fear Takzog, dat why"
Prediction: Pur'pl Pee'pl Eatr's too strong 3-2
Player to watch: Pur'pl Pee'pl Eatr's rookie thrower Morkram "3 Thumbs" got 2 scores last week but is out this week so look for Gabnar Redhand to take up the slack and score one or even 2, i am sure after the game we may see a new set of skills from this player
Match Day 4
Coach Jester - Anubis Serpents vs Doc Oz - Pur'pl Pee'pl Eatr's
Pur'pl Pee'pl Eatr's Thrower Sorth Longfinger said "weez winz dis en good, my teamz will brak der bonez and me score, dem not gotz no muscles dat why dey lose" The serpent have placed a recruiting drive on, 2 of our reports found out the hard what what that means as they were killed, stripped of their flesh and put on the practice squad, but turns out they were no good and have now been dropped from the side.
Prediction: 3-0 to Pur'pl Pee'pl Eatr's, Serpents have yet to even score and wont again this game
Player to watch: The Big Fella is looking to make a statement this game
Michaels - Calamitous Intent vs Jounisii- Sour Saurii
Intense Iguana said "MVP baby just wait and see, you all know its going to be meee" while nergle warrior Fantomas was quoted to say "The real race is in the pain we inflict, I am equal second with 2 casualties, I would have 87 if the counter the fans but this stupid league only count the players i hurt... Hmm I wonder I i get points for killing reporters?" we didnt stick around to find out
Prediction: Sour Saurii to much class and speed they win 2-1
Player to watch: Intense Iguana can any stop him?
Deano79- Delf Delights vs Goodpass- Jumpy Harpies
Game of the week: Disheartened Coach Goodpass was all but ready to walk out the league, he is not used to being on the losing side, but it was only a feeling right after his loss last week and now he is ready to show all he is still a danger but seems they will not be using a tree this week as none show on their roster, no players were available for a comment. Double D we could not shut up all going on how they will crush this and smash that, we didnt want to listen... well thats till Lilriarna came out and said "you guys like my new bra I will have on for the game?" we all nodded yes but were quickly snapped back to attention and had to run round to get her what she wanted when she then cracked her whip and said "What are you meat sacks still doing just looking? go get me something fucking nice to eat or their will be trouble"
Prediction: DD should win 3-2
Player to watch: witch elves Calfenam and Lilriarna, once again
Match Day 5
Michaels - Calamitous Intent vs Doc Oz - Pur'pl Pee'pl Eatr's
Game of the week: Calamitous Intent last week Hit Goodpass and his elves so hard they left the league for the rest the season, they can smell the blood in the water with The Pur'pl Pee'pl Eatr's having to start a new troll. Warrior The Monarch said " yes we, shall use ones better breeding, to overcome ones enemies on the Field of conflict". As for the triple P's we caught up with thrower Longfinger who went to a High elf passing work shop, he was kicked out after 4 hours after starting three fights and even ate someones dog. "yeah it woz fun, I learns ta frow da ball safe now, me no risk uvver team to catch me frows"
Prediction: Those Orcs seen too hard to stop but they may start to feel the pain of this long season 2-1 to triple P but one or 2 orc stars will miss the next game
Player to watch:New Troll flaprot Doo'n Kil'um how well will he match up to the beast in his first game?
Deano79- Delf Delights vs Coach Jester - Anubis Serpents
Last week Serpents star Patella Pete used acid from a special made hollowed out fake rid bone to kill and dissolve Lazyvomit Tinky Winky and was ejected by the ref, this was in response to Rotten Ribs Roberts killed just moments before coach Jester after the game said "Roberts was a great player and took on the burden of the team he gave his unlife doing what he loved, hitting and killing, he will be missed, but now the focus can shit from trying to get him into the hall of fame and now work on the rest the team, the seasom maybe lost but we can kill and take out as many as we can and that's the new plan, we are also missing tomb guard Tank this week but we may hire some help" Later that day Ramtut was seen walking into the serpents facilities.
Double D lineman Erdar spoke to us as we could not get close to the witch elves "gee no one has ever asked me a question before, um, how will we do? well um good i think, um look just go ask one our blitzers, I just run to where they tell me from the coach, um, oh I know what i am to say, we are taking it one game at a time"
Prediction: 4-0 to double D sperents have yet to score and i dont see that changing soon
Player to watch:Patella Pete, just what sneaky fouls will we see, or not see?
Jounisii- Sour Saurii vs Havol- Border Crossers
This will be the First game for the BC's as they come in to replace Goodpass and his elves, They are no stranger to the immortal league and played in season 3, Star thrower Eber Delchasam "Look we have played cold bloods before we still are looking at crystal ball footage of them but we will be ready, they look to be a good team and are the champs but we are up to the task and have a few ticks of our own"
Sour Saurii will be missing 3 players for the game one is a Saurus with less hitting power and less players this may prove the difference. Grumpy Gharial "I neeedsss sssa new Humansss ssskin Jacket and ssshoess, hmmm a bag asss well, after thisss game I am sssure I will have them"
Prediction: 3-2 Havol gets his first official win of season 5
Player to watch: Intense Iguana is on record pace for the MVP
Match Day 6
Havol- Border Crossers vs Coach Jester - Anubis Serpents
This it to be the 100th game for the big fella,Star Tomb guard for the Serpents, his team have vowed to play hard for him. Rookie throw ra Metacarpals McFee said "its an honor to play with such a legend I plan to get some of these human flesh bags and help convert them to want to play for us, lets hope they all drink poison after the game and sign up, after all who wouldn't want to?"
When we asked BC's Ogre Der Hur-Hur what he thought about what McFee had said he replied "Er wot, I dont av a bag just me elmut ere, I dont getz it? but i like a good drink, wot is poizon anywayz?"
Prediction: 3-0 Havol gets his first official win of season 5
Player to watch:Da Big Fella who else
Jounisii- Sour Saurii vs Doc Oz - Pur'pl Pee'pl Eatr's
Game of the week: Its 1st vs 2nd and we are set for a big one, PPE's star Morgost Skullsplitter offered these fighting words. "I will eat skink pie before during and after da game" Intense Iguana only responded with "yeah right asss if they can catch usss, He isss just a big green bag of wind, jussst watch me ssscore"
Prediction: 1-1
Player to watch:Morgost Skullsplitter just how many will he eat?
Deano79- Delf Delights vs Michaels - Calamitous Intent
Game was played 1-1 we Caught up to double D's Blitzer Torfir who is the only member on the team to hurt the opposition this season, we asked him about their lack of hitting "look we play with style, a thing the rest of you and the the other teams lack, but if you doubt we can hit i will be happy to take you out back and show you what we can do you fucking twat." we didnt go to Calamitous Intent's press conference, no one did, they just smell too bad
Match Day 7
Deano79- Delf Delights vs Coach Jester - Anubis Serpents
It has been the worst season the serpents have ever had and Coach jester has mad some big changes and sacked star skeleton Ben backbone blake will this shake up of the roster get some of the other stars to shine?
Prediction: after a 5-0 loss last week i think its safe to say the serpents will not win this... another loss 4-0
Player to watch:I for one will keep an eye on skull frecking smith, in 3 games he has a kill and 2 injured
Doc Oz - Pur'pl Pee'pl Eatr's vs Michaels - Calamitous Intent
Doc and his team looked unstoppable until he ran into Calamitous Intent, Has Michaels got the answer again? we asked 21 what he thought "I kick, I hit, dats wot I do" dont worry fans we wont ask 21 for more incite again.
Prediction: 2-1 Calamitous Intent
Player to watch:lets see if 21 will kick and hit
Jounisii- Sour Saurii vs Havol- Border Crossers
Catcher Detlef Mehia "yeah thies game wont be a problem for us, I get to line up on skinks, they got nothing on me"
Prediction: 2-1 BC
Player to watch:Catcher Detlef Mehia had 3 scores last week what will he do this week
Match Day 8
Doc Oz - Pur'pl Pee'pl Eatr's vs Havol - Border Crossers
These teams have yet to meet in this season of the Immortal League. The Border Crossers have an opportune game to snatch sneaky victory from the league leaders this week; Doc will be down a little bit of muscle, his star thrower will be sorely missed, and will be down to a single gobo on his bench (pre-inducements). Even so, the Pee’pl Eatr’s blitzing corp can never be counted out, and will be looking to keep the wheels on against the Border Crosser’s full pace offence.
Prediction: Hav might just pip the league leaders to the post. 2-1 to the humans.
Player to watch: One might be tempted to point to the block/pro ogre, but I suspect it’ll be impossible to take your eyes off Takzog Goblinluva. In the absence of a reliable thrower, this str5 blodge monster may well be called on for holding onto the ball, and never letting go.
Coach Jester - Anubis Serpents vs Michaels - Calamitous Intent
My grandfather still raves on about the glory days of the Anubis Serpents, when they looked nigh on unstoppable. Some of the old stars are still firing (they’ve been going for millennia, they aren’t gonna stop now) and Da Big Fella is always mobbed by adoring fans looking for autographs, but the organisers of this competition have gone a step too far this week. Why would they let a team with as much history and prestige as the Serpents be pit against the murderous death machine that Coach Michaels is commanding? Are they really that desperate for ticket sales this season? Yet the Tomb Guards are as un-phased and silent as ever. They know that this too, will pass.
Prediction: Everyone loves an underdog… Jester FTW! C’mon mate – we all believe in you (except Michaels who probably wants to piss on your TG’s graves). 2-0 to the mighty serpents, says the fan-boy replacement fluff writer for the week.
Player to watch: Always, only, ever – Da BIG FELLA!
Deano79- Delf Delights vs Jounisii- Sour Saurii
Two teams, tied in second place at the tail end of the season will be fighting for bragging rights this week. Lets see how the teams match up…
Assassin > Skink (if he can close the distance)
Sauri bruisers > collective str/guard of delfs
Pace of lizards (approximately equal to) manoeuvrability of delfs
Both teams have more than enough tools to deal with their opposition’s tactics… This will be the game to watch imo.
Prediction: 2-2 draw with the assassin putting his leaping knife to good use against a skink or two.
Player to watch: Grumpy. He’s still upset about an orc imposter from the little leagues stealing his name – he’ll be looking to prove once and for all who the real Grumpy is. Heads will roll.
Match Day 9
Jounisii- Sour Saurii vs Doc Oz - Pur'pl Pee'pl Eatr's
Its 1st vs 2nd, is this the prelude to the final? We spoke to Takzog Goblinluva "dere iz no second only first and that be us, dem cold bloods will get a lot colder when dey are six feet under"
Prediction: 2-2 draw
Player to watch: Takzog Goblinluva seems to be on a mission watch out
Deano79- Delf Delights vs Michaels - Calamitous Intent[/i][/b]
Both teams need a win here to have a shot at the final. Double D will find it hard to pass in this game, we asked DD runner Menlil how he plans to handle it "We are focused and wont let anything distract us, they are too slow to catch us anyway, we are confident we can still air it out"
Prediction: Double D for the win 2-1
Player to watch: Will Menlil really try to pass or is it just pre game politics?
Coach Jester - Anubis Serpents vs Havol - Border Crossers
What a horrid season for the Serpents, and it wont get any better, we asked Coach Jester about the season "obviously losing some of our best players at the start of the season set us back, yeah we are now just working to rebuild, we have a few rookies we want to try out for the remaining games and see where it takes us, we will try to end the season on a high that's all we can do"
Prediction: Border Crossers win big 4-1
Player to watch: Border Crossers ogre Der-Hur-Hur lets see how he handles the tomb guards and will he try to go one on one with the legend himself the big fella?
Match Day 10
Havol- Border Crossers vs DocOz- Pur'pl Pee'pl Eatr's
Havol is coming off of the back of a shock loss last week, but will want to put a dent in Doc's post season intentions in his last match of the season. Doc needs to win here to secure his Final spot and will need to play well to get it. Hav has a full squad and knows how to use these Humies. Doc may have the better 11, but he will have to do a lot of maiming to get a numerical advantage that he can thrive on.
Prediction: 2-1 to Havol, I just think the extra bit of pace may do for the Orcs.
Player to Watch: Takzog Goblinluva... a ST 5 dodging Orc... need I say more!!
Michaels - Calamitous Intent vs Coach Jester - Anubis Serpents
Michaels Nurgle are in with a shot of the Final, but rely on results elsewhere. Unfortunately for him he comes up against a resurgent Anubis Serpents, a team that can match his strength and then some. And with his NW's taking a battering last week, even more so than normal. Coach Jester's controversial clear out after a bad start to the season is starting to bear fruit too. A win last week has buoyed the troops and this is just the sort of brawl they will be relishing.
Prediction: 2-1 to The Serpents, just too much strength for Michaels to punch through.
Player to watch: Da Big Fella... one of only 2 IP legends... this TG demands respect and watching!
Jounisii- Sour Saurii vs Deano79- Delf Delights
Lizards in another final at IP.... sigh!! Well the Sour Saurii are there, and deservingly so. This match 2 weeks ago saw a 2-1 win for Jounisii and I think that this game will be much the same. Double D fluffed their lines last week, 2 opportunities to score and win and stay in the race saw cruel bounces of the ball, and so this will be their last match of the season. As for the Saurii, well they are there already, so do they play it safe and protect their key players or do they carry on pounding hard as they have been all season.... time will tell.
Prediction: 2-1 to the Saurii, too much strength, and no leap for Double D this time around.
Player to Watch: Grumpy Gharial. An odd choice given the Skinks on show, but he was key to the Saurii's victory on MD8 and will need to be at his BT best again.
The Final
Jounisii- Sour Saurii vs Doc Oz - Pur'pl Pee'pl Eatr's
And what a final it will be, Coach Jounisii will go in as the underdog for this one as he has two key players out, but he has experience on his side and his team is no stranger to the big stage, with roughly 420 to spend before the game expect some surprises. Will we see a star player? or two? Referee The Goober will be officiating his third final, we asked him will he call a tight and fair game? "Look I do the best I can out there to call the game as fair as i can see, but it is hard sometimes, I need new glasses and my whistle is not always working, sadly I cant afford to get new ones before them. But I will make do" We found it strange that the Goober has never been seen with glasses, but he refused to comment on the question, was it a message to the teams?
when we spoke to Grudging Gecko IV about the ref's statement he only said "I have to stay focused on the game, I have a whistle I can give him if he likes, and my coach is a great guy I am sure he and the team can help him with the money he needs once we win and we will have plenty prize money to go round"
This is the first time on the big stage for Doc and his Pur'pl Pee'pl Eatr's his Blitzers are some of the biggest stars to ever step onto the astro-granite and have the nick name the legion of Boom, will they have nerves and play safe? They played safe vs Calamitous Intent and lost both games will they do the same? we asked Takzogs pet gobbo what he thought about the game "Weee yeah meez be in final, Takzog feed me good, and when me getz da chance me will sqish dem skinkz, dat intentz gwanna fellow is nuffink, I be big star in game youz will see and master Takzog be bigga star dan all of youz... gotz ta go and giff master iz sponge barf now, he likes da wayz i rub hiz muskoolz"
Prediction: This is way to close to call, I do think it will go to extra time and end 3-2 but who? I just don't know... make sure you dont miss it as tickets are selling fast
Player to Watch: Sorth Longfinger is this seasons MVP, he can throw, catch, score and hit he can do it all and well, his deep throws have some elf fans cheering his name. Lets not also forget last seasons MVP, he score 11 TD's and that is a new record, some say he should have got the MVP and maybe they are right. Look to see him stare and out shine Sorth on the field.