Post by parrigan on Jul 26, 2018 0:59:48 GMT
We meet again, fair coaches. Or maybe not so fair. Who's to say? I am! Not fair at all! Anyway, we're on to week 2, and let's see if we can ratchet up the violence level a notch
Grandfather Bones was very disappointed in the week 1 performance, and he's looking for some payback this week. 2 deaths??!! Seriously? And not a single one in Division 1? You guys fighting with feathers or what? Get your kill on!!
Death Counter: 4
Target: 30 (still pending the S14 final, cause those guys are slowpokes)
Please schedule your matches before 23.59GMT Friday, July 27 and play them before 23.59GMT Wednesday, August 1. Any admin results will be determined strictly based on what is posted here. If you schedule elsewhere, that's fine, but it's advisable for both coaches to still post the agreed upon time here on the forum.
The matchups:
Division 1:
And here we have two teams looking to get into the winner's circle after a rough week 1. The Aquatics got elfed, and they're looking to avoid another elfing. The Villians got... we don't know what they got - stupid blackouts. But whatever they got must not have been good. "They'll get more of it thisss week," predicts Bash the saurus. "More losssing. Sssee, they lossst. They'll lossse again thisss week." Yeah, we got it. Another genius on the pitch, we see. "We shan't discuss last week," cautions blitzer Red Skull. "You would be wise to stop asking." Walking away now...
Unwashed Beards (DWA) v Spite Pack Stitchers (GOB)
Deano79 v Weresquid
We wrap Division 1 with what looks like a mismatch on it's surface. But really, aren't all goblin matches mismatches? Even their penchant for "creative rules interpretations" isn't even to even the scales most matches. "There's a reason fer that," explains longbeard Akmek. "Dey're small, dey're green, dey're dumb. So now ya know. Goblins is dumb, is why dey lose." Brilliantly put. "Dumb?" asks Bone Crusher the fanatic. "That's funny, seems like we're the ones who know how to keep our traps shut. Makin' our trolls mad, now that's dumb. And we don't cheat!" We would never imply such a thing. Ever.
Division 2:
Air Force Ogre (OGR) v Taintacular (NEC)
vonKotze v michaels
Our 3rd ogre entry is the only one without a week 1 win, but they did manage a draw. Who knew ogres were so good? Matched with them is the current last place team, but we're betting they don't finish at the bottom. "Oh, they'll surely stay there for one more week," declares Manfred von Killhofen. "I say, it seems inevitable, no? We're very large, after all. And, well, they're not. Seems obvious." That much is true. Erudite ogres? Much less obvious. "Them ogres got holes, don't they?" sneers werewolf Holes. "We're gonna exploit them holes. We're gonna exploit them hard." That seems wrong, but not unexpected.
We predict someone will scores a few TDs in this one. Plenty of speed to be found on this pitch. The Lemons figure to be relying heavily on their passing game. "Ya ever seen one o' them lizards try to throw, like, anything?" laughs Lemon catcher Five Nights. "Funny stuff. Ball is as big as the little dudes, and the big ones? Ha! We got this." It is a bit funny, for sure. "Why would anyone passs?" queries saurus Rougarou. "We won lassst week without passsing. It'sss jussst asssking to lossse the ball. Let thossse foolsss passs." Running game it is for the Myths.
Cop a load of this (SKA) v Murderous Mist Marauders (VAM)
Ravers v DocOz
Get it on!
Grandfather Bones was very disappointed in the week 1 performance, and he's looking for some payback this week. 2 deaths??!! Seriously? And not a single one in Division 1? You guys fighting with feathers or what? Get your kill on!!
Death Counter: 4
Target: 30 (still pending the S14 final, cause those guys are slowpokes)
Please schedule your matches before 23.59GMT Friday, July 27 and play them before 23.59GMT Wednesday, August 1. Any admin results will be determined strictly based on what is posted here. If you schedule elsewhere, that's fine, but it's advisable for both coaches to still post the agreed upon time here on the forum.
The matchups:
Division 1:
Avalon's Army (PRO) v Power Ogre-whelming (OGR)
Nails v comfort_eagle
Leading off the slate we have two of the week 1 victors squaring off in what promises to be an interesting matchup. Elfy business v big smash and snot toss, sounds fun. "Eh, the lizards were big too," dismisses catcher Napoleon. "You saw how we ran around them. It should be obvious we're the best team around. I mean, seriously." That old elf confidence (there are other words for it). "Huh huh," chuffs Goku the ogre. "Those little pointy-ears are pretty. I bet they'd fly good. I'm gonna try throwin' one. Huh huh." Well that would be entertaining, but perhaps the big guys should focus on winning...
Royal Rumble (NUR) v Snotlings are for Throwin (OGR)
Havol v Tencoin
Rumor has it the Rumble did not enjoy tangling with dorfs last week. Well we got good news for 'em! Oh wait, ogres? Hmm... never mind. "Yeah!" shouts Big John Studd. "We got this! Good old fashioned rumble with some big dumb dudes. The way rasslin' - er, Blood Bowl - is meant to be. Wooo!" Well, maybe it is good news after all. There's no accounting for taste. "Yar, we're big." confirms Dar Coarse. "Yar, we play Blood Bowl. Yar." An ogre of few words. We like it, though we do wish their match wasn't blacked out last week.
Gorland Aquatics (LIZ) v Marvelous Villians XV (DAE)
Gorbag1 v CrypticKnight90And here we have two teams looking to get into the winner's circle after a rough week 1. The Aquatics got elfed, and they're looking to avoid another elfing. The Villians got... we don't know what they got - stupid blackouts. But whatever they got must not have been good. "They'll get more of it thisss week," predicts Bash the saurus. "More losssing. Sssee, they lossst. They'll lossse again thisss week." Yeah, we got it. Another genius on the pitch, we see. "We shan't discuss last week," cautions blitzer Red Skull. "You would be wise to stop asking." Walking away now...
Unwashed Beards (DWA) v Spite Pack Stitchers (GOB)
Deano79 v Weresquid
We wrap Division 1 with what looks like a mismatch on it's surface. But really, aren't all goblin matches mismatches? Even their penchant for "creative rules interpretations" isn't even to even the scales most matches. "There's a reason fer that," explains longbeard Akmek. "Dey're small, dey're green, dey're dumb. So now ya know. Goblins is dumb, is why dey lose." Brilliantly put. "Dumb?" asks Bone Crusher the fanatic. "That's funny, seems like we're the ones who know how to keep our traps shut. Makin' our trolls mad, now that's dumb. And we don't cheat!" We would never imply such a thing. Ever.
Air Force Ogre (OGR) v Taintacular (NEC)
vonKotze v michaels
Our 3rd ogre entry is the only one without a week 1 win, but they did manage a draw. Who knew ogres were so good? Matched with them is the current last place team, but we're betting they don't finish at the bottom. "Oh, they'll surely stay there for one more week," declares Manfred von Killhofen. "I say, it seems inevitable, no? We're very large, after all. And, well, they're not. Seems obvious." That much is true. Erudite ogres? Much less obvious. "Them ogres got holes, don't they?" sneers werewolf Holes. "We're gonna exploit them holes. We're gonna exploit them hard." That seems wrong, but not unexpected.
Marvel at Me! (DAE) v Potato Skinz (ORC)
Nightwind v King Cann
And here are two of our many teams who started with a draw. Elf v orc, heroes v... potatoes? Sure, why not? "Clearly, we will emerge victorious from this," says blitzer Spiderman. "We wouldn't be heroes if we didn't have some adversity to overcome, right? And, I mean, a draw? That's pretty adverse." Um, if you say so. Seems like it could be worse. "Yup," agrees black orc Spudnik. "Worse. Could get your blitzer killed on a cheap shot. Good thing we're super tough, right? Orcs rule. That's all you need to know." Well then, rule on if you can.
Every Villain Is Lemons! (HUM) v Myth Fortune (LIZ)
ThreeofClubs v Parrigan NiallWe predict someone will scores a few TDs in this one. Plenty of speed to be found on this pitch. The Lemons figure to be relying heavily on their passing game. "Ya ever seen one o' them lizards try to throw, like, anything?" laughs Lemon catcher Five Nights. "Funny stuff. Ball is as big as the little dudes, and the big ones? Ha! We got this." It is a bit funny, for sure. "Why would anyone passs?" queries saurus Rougarou. "We won lassst week without passsing. It'sss jussst asssking to lossse the ball. Let thossse foolsss passs." Running game it is for the Myths.
Cop a load of this (SKA) v Murderous Mist Marauders (VAM)
Ravers v DocOz
The battle of below! The sewers v the sarcophagi! You get the point: rats and vamps. One team trying to confuse with speed, the other trying to discombobulate with their eyes. "No sweat," says gutter runner Copper Tubes. "We won't see their eyes when they're so far behind us, ya know?" We suppose that makes sense but the real question here is: do rats sweat? We want to know. "They can run," proclaims Duke Norman. "but it won't be enough. I mean, look at us. We're terrifying, right? They'll be too busy cowering to bother with the ball." Sounds good, but we suspect they don't know rats.
Get it on!